Tips For A First Date

 by Dean Cortez, MackTactics.com

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Hey Dean,

I decided to finally break up with my (now ex) girlfriend. She’d been totally controlling and manipulating me for the past four years. So, I'm back out there dating, and feeling pretty optimistic. I met a really hot girl at a work function and asked her out. But I’ll admit I’m rusty with the “first date” stuff, I’ve been off the scene for a long time. Do you have any suggestions?

- Eric, New York City 

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In order to pull off the ultimate first date, create deep attraction, and hopefully steer things back to your place at the end of the night, you’re going to have to use the methods and conversation strategies that we explain in our book. But for starters, there are some fundamental first date tips for men to always remember:

* Keep your spending to a minimum. With first dates, never try to impress her by shelling out the bucks. This puts you in the wrong position. Maintain the attitude that this is her chance to sell herself to YOU, not the other way around. Meet her for coffee (not at a Starbucks -- find a cool, out-of-the-way, comfortable coffee shop for dates). Or, meet her for drinks. Skip the places that everyone knows, and find “date locations” that will show her you’re an original type of guy who knows the cool “off the radar” spots. 

BONUS TIP: Make her feel extra special by saying to her, “This is one of my favorite places. I think of it as my private sanctuary, I never bring anyone here. But I knew you’d enjoy it, so I wanted to show it to you...”

* Have a backup plan. The place you’ve selected could be closed for renovations, her ex-boyfriend might work there, who knows. Have a different location that you can take her to, if need be. The Mack is a man of action, and always has a complete plan.

* Plan on keeping the date brief. For a first meeting, 1-2 hours is usually perfect. You want an escape hatch in case she doesn’t meet your standards. (Never plan some all-day activity with a girl until you’re certain you want to spend that much time with her.) Also, unless you’re confident that you can take her home at the end of the night, it’s better to cut things short and create the sense that your time is precious and limited.

You should be the one to decide when the date ends. (“Well I’ve got a huge day tomorrow, I need to be up bright and early…we’ll have to do this again soon.”) Don’t stretch things out so that she’s the one checking her watch and telling you she needs to get home. End the date on a high point, before things start winding down, and plan on sealing the deal the next time you see her. As the greatest entertainers in showbiz know, you’ve always got to “leave ‘em wanting more.”

* Always be punctual. Don't be slightly late on purpose; it sets the wrong tone. Make sure you know the directions to the location, and arrive 10 minutes early so that you’re totally prepared.

* Dress appropriately. It’s always better to be a little overdressed than underdressed. You can  be sure she’s going to dress well for the date. She’ll feel uncomfortable if you roll in wearing a tee-shirt and shorts.

* Let her do most of the talking. Ask questions that prompt her to open up and share with you. Again, maintain the attitude that this is her chance to impress YOU. It’s better to be vague and cultivate a sense of mystery around yourself, than to tell her your life story within the first two hours. Let her talk about herself and share with you. The more details she shares with you, and the more you seem to appreciate what she’s saying, the more it feels to her like a connection is building. This elevates you beyond the average guy, who treats every first date as if he’s auditioning for the position of her boyfriend, and feels he needs to “sell himself” by talking himself up.

Visit MackTactics.com for many more tips for first dates, including ideas for first dates things to do. You'll also get a complete, step-by-step system for becoming massively attractive and confident with women.

Your Wingman,

Dean Cortez